The problem is to know what you want...

I've been 10 days away and now I'm back in my very quite job, my messy house from where i'm happily moving tomorrow, Im back to solitary reality I built for myself. And I didn't even care about the fucker that left me waiting and is playing with my mind while I was away, out there there's so much to see, so many people to meet. But I AM HERE right now. And here means a place where I fancy noone, whereI should make my standars low to be with someone. Im not like that. But there is something about this guy that keeps me hooked. Or maybe is only that I have nothing better to do.

One way or the other I had to hate myself for 2 days thinking if he would come and talk to me, deleting his number was a good idea, but there is still facebook... I know he can see what I post, and I can see when he is online. When I get tired of waiting I end meeting him by pure casuality but in a rush, no idea if I was supposed to understand the "see you around" like, good luck or what. The next day I end deciding to send him a message explaining that things dont work anymore and I would prefer not to have him in facebook. Of course, and it looks like a freaking joke... when I take the computer to write he starts chatting with me...

He can't hurt me as he did already. I'm not hooked in the emotional way, I can't say exactly why Im still talking to him. I would like someone mature that can tell me things as they are "I thought about what you said, this and that!"... I would like so much obviously... I made it clear that I was still interested, cause te truth is the winter is coming and Ill enjoy whatever good this guy has to offer, but Ill have clear the limits too. Anyway. I don't know where this is going. I don't want to be again the one is left, I almost never been there and I hate it, my pride hates it! So, do I take a quick desition and I finish things now? (My pride will be happy, but I may be risking some fun??) Or do I wait to, maybe, end up being left... I mean is obvious this is going nowhere as it is. For me this time away was too long and I feel so cold about him.

Why on earth he has that power of making me stay in the hook, in a practical way. If a guy disapears in the middle of a conversation, or doesn't answer you last text... technologie is ruining relationships!!!!