Why not?

I always refused to start a blog like this one. I used to tell myself that my own life is not that interesting to make of it kind of a show.

Recently, I discovered that, hey, the life I thought easy, simple, relax, is actually as complicate as anyone else's!!!

So, here I am, starting a blog where I'm going to write my thoughts in a language that is not my own (mistakes excused!) trying to understand. Understand. So, first, you may be wondering why to start this now, why not before, why bother with it at all...

Well, there a simple reason, the only one I can think of at the moment: a couple of weeks ago the guy I was dating told me he cheated on me.

WTF???

It doesn't seem to be directly connected with starting a blog, but apart from the fact that of course was as shocking as shit, it also made me question myself a lot of things... And, by the way, no, I don't care if the girl is prettier or whatever, I'm not the kind of girl who would feel bad with herself cause a fucker cheated on her, nah. But I always considered myself flexible, able to cope with new ideas, even cool with open relationships... come on, I did bad things too. I guess is the pride that is not letting me getting over this shit (if I didn't mention it, I wasn't in love with the guy - who from now shall be known as the french fucker, cause that what he was! -).

So, keeping the line of 'trying to understand'... there are other factors that are not helping me getting over this disaster of relationship. First, and is all my fault, I tried to stay as sex budies with this fucker, though, he was honest to tell me on my face what he had done (thank you, oh my God, thank you so much....), he wasn't honest enough to tell me that he was actually going out with the girl... So sudenly, you changed you girlfriend for your lover and your lover for your girlfrien, no damages. Nah, stupid I am not. Second, I live in a town with 1.200 habs... my town has one street!!! So, thank Lord I'm a decent girl, cause I have to see the french fucker like 4 times a day around. So, ok, I'm not going to feel bad if is taking me a while to forget, I'm trying to delete the good moments and himself from my memory when I'm still seeing him around all the time!

Now, the reason this situation is the direct cause of the creation of this blog, is not because I want to damn all the men gender, but because is making me face all the relationships I had, the lifestyle I want to have (and I worked hard to get) and, this is the hardest part, my future. Every single aspect of my future is a big question mark, and, hey, I hate thinking about the future!

So, why not?